Refresh(Mental)
Intercontinental Incontinence: Flying the Friendly, er, Fecal Skies

Intercontinental Incontinence: Flying the Friendly, er, Fecal Skies

BEFORE I SHARE MY STORY, PLEASE BE SURE YOU WRITE YOUR CONGRESSMEN/WOMEN TODAY IN PROTEST OF SOPA AND PIPA. Wikipedia has made contacting your representatives easy. Click here.  I have no idea how I forgot this story. But the other day, it surfaced in my mind like Luke Skywalker’s X-Wing from the bog on Dagobah....
Guest Post by Jennifer Luitwieler: "Emotional Constipation's Uglier Cousin"

Guest Post by Jennifer Luitwieler: “Emotional Constipation’s Uglier Cousin”

One of the reasons I adore Chad Thomas Johnston and think of him as a brother from another mother is his affinity for stories with a fecal undertone. I was introduced to Chad’s penchant for potty humor through his post on a snow toilet he built with his sister in their yard one winter. They...
The Assassination of JF(Burger)K(ing): Meeting Doodle #242

The Assassination of JF(Burger)K(ing): Meeting Doodle #242

I doodle during meetings at work in order to keep my mind from wandering. But sometimes my mind wanders into even weirder territory when the doodles begin to take shape. I still pay attention to the meeting, which explains some of the incoherence of the resulting doodles (i.e. see the inexplicable lower portion of a...
CTJ Designs Inexplicable "Sock Monkeys Licking Wallpaper" Graphic for WritRams.com

CTJ Designs Inexplicable “Sock Monkeys Licking Wallpaper” Graphic for WritRams.com

My friend Jackie asked me to draw “sock monkeys licking wallpaper,” and since there was a paycheck involved, I didn’t ask any questions. It was like working for the mafia. I sketched the basic image out at a meeting during work (as always), and then created about 3 different drafts of the final graphic at...
Now Playing at the (a)Musing Foodie Blog: CTJ's "Indoor Smoke Signals"

Now Playing at the (a)Musing Foodie Blog: CTJ’s “Indoor Smoke Signals”

My latest piece, “Indoor Smoke Signals,” is available for reading at the (a)Musing Foodie blog, which is hosted by the Liza Hawkins – the Interweb’s preeminent charmer where chowing down is concerned. So do yourself a favor. Read the article here and then follow Liza on Twitter here. An excerpt: My sister and I would’ve noticed...
Nobody Wants to Be the Stinky Kid: CTJ Creates Planetary Recycling Poster for Allen Press, Inc.

Nobody Wants to Be the Stinky Kid: CTJ Creates Planetary Recycling Poster for Allen Press, Inc.

I created the above poster (click on it to enlarge it) for Allen Press, Inc., my place of employment here in Lawrence, KS. First, I sketched the shapes and facial expressions for each planet. Then I used GIMP, a freeware raster graphics alternative to Adobe Photoshop, to “ink” the images. The whole project took me...
An Accidental Lesson in Quantum Mechanics: Tripping Over the Twitterverse

An Accidental Lesson in Quantum Mechanics: Tripping Over the Twitterverse

While parallel universes belong to the realm of quantum mechanics, I happened to stumble upon one myself this year without any scientific know-how whatsoever: The Twitterverse. Yes, I have discovered the miracle of Twitter. I, who referred to Twitter as the utmost example of Western cultural decline as recent as August of 2010, have become...
Only in Dreams #3: Flunking Students and Failing as a Teacher

Only in Dreams #3: Flunking Students and Failing as a Teacher

I taught public speaking at Missouri State University for five years, which is a way of saying I tortured hundreds of students for 1825 days. Which makes me sound like a Third World dictator that should be taken out by the United States. I saw countless students squirm like slices of bacon in a sizzling...
Vlad's Vlog: Vol. 2, Talkin' Bad High School Poetry

Vlad’s Vlog: Vol. 2, Talkin’ Bad High School Poetry

I wrote this putrid poem in high school after listening to the Smashing Pumpkins, if memory serves correct. In fact, Billy Corgan’s line “The world is a vampire / sent to dray-ee-ay-ee-ayn” is largely responsible for this piece. All apologies to Billy Corgan & Co. I wish I were kidding, but I am not. I...
STOP: Hammer Time

STOP: Hammer Time

Like so many other things I draw, this one qualifies as “meeting art.” Drew it during a meeting at work. For whatever reason, drawing really focuses my mind. It enables me to listen better. And in the end, it results in ridiculous pictures, too. So no complaints here.
CTJ Creates Cover Art for Author Dwain Smith's New Book "Bullheaded"

CTJ Creates Cover Art for Author Dwain Smith’s New Book “Bullheaded”

In February, one of my contacts on Twitter, Claudia Hall Christian (@ClaudiaC), indirectly introduced me to Washington D. C.-based author Dwain Smith (@DwainSmith). She informed her followers that I was interested in creating book art, as I love drawing (in addition to writing). But I gave Claudia a little extra bait to put on her...
For Your Enjoyment and/or Destroyment: "Dear Uncle Sam," an Early Foray into Fiction

For Your Enjoyment and/or Destroyment: “Dear Uncle Sam,” an Early Foray into Fiction

I took a short-fiction course with Dr. Roland Sodowsky in 1997 at Missouri State University (then Southwest Missouri State University), and I wrote two short stories by the end of the course. This was one of them. Preserved in all of its flawed glory, I present to you “Dear Uncle Sam” in PDF format below,...